A stress free home is created in large part by the wife. She is the constant presence there so her tastes, style, and attitude are going to permeate even every fiber in the carpet. When the wife is having a rough day, everyone else probably is going to, too.
Example: I wake up on the wrong side of the bed because we are out of coffee. There is a chain reaction of events because of this. My foul mood manifests itself in my attitude. And just in case no one notices my bad mood, I might even say some less than uplifting things. I might do the dishes a little more loudly than is justified. This puts everyone on edge and I'll bet they can't wait to get out of the house. If it's a Saturday or if Daniel is at home (like right now) due to a layoff or Work Comp then we are all in for a really bad day, because they can't get away from me without some lame excuse to go to the neighbor's house or store. So, he starts in with half-jokes and doing things a little more loudly than is justified. My son retreats to a corner of the house sighing through his nose and starts making some really cutting remarks to the cat. And now we are all good and in a bad mood. This can go on for hours, because once it starts, it's hard to stop. Self takes over and it's like we want to be mad.
The next morning, that black elixir is in abundance and I'm having a pretty good morning. Maybe I will make breakfast for everyone. I look at housecleaning like blessing my family instead of like some awful chore Cindrella's sisters put off on her. My husband is at peace and has a little more patience for the little things that go wrong and so does my son. The cat is laying in the sunbeams soaking up the day and we are all at peace.
Now, of course everyone has the super-villain power of putting everyone in a foul mood. The wife has the super-hero's power of creating a peaceful environment though and this gives us a leg up on it. Burning a candle that smells like grass being mowed on the first Saturday of spring, and ensuring the beds are made and the dishes are done can do wonders. When a pot of chicken noodle soup is on the stove, and biscuits are in the oven, it does good to hearts and minds. When I have in my minds eye the vision of grace and mercy, my house seems to run a little smoother and there are less large conflicts.
We need to feed our serenity or the super-villain will take over. One of the ways I do this is by coloring. I remember dragging my daughter to the table when she was young so we could color. Long after she was gone, I'd be sitting there in all my glory with coloring books and crayons or markers just whiling away the hours of the afternoon.
I've recently found they make adult coloring books! The patterns are a more complicated and attention to detail is required. These are amazing. I prefer colored pencils to markers, and I can sit and color when everyone else is off doing their own thing and feed my serenity. Coloring puts me in a peaceful mood and relaxes my mind. While I color I might think of a certain problem that needs dealt with and solutions for that. or I might think of nothing at all other than the color scheme I'm using. I do have to be careful that I'm not too hard on myself for getting outside of the lines or for certain colors not truly going together like I thought they might. The one below is one I just started.
These books can be found at Walmart in the crafts section with the colored pencils. For the Walmart I go to they were just a couple of aisles away from the yarn. They are pretty cheap, too, ranging from like $5 to $10. It takes me a few hours to finish a page and often I cannot finish a page in one sitting.
Other things I do is crochet, walk my dog, and play video games. Yeah, I play video games, lol. I'm careful of the games I choose, but I do play. A video game is like a movie where you control the actions of the character you are playing. Minecraft is a good one we are all currently playing together in my house.
At any rate, find whatever it is that feeds your peace and do that thing or things every day. As mom's it's easy to get caught up in all we have to do. Remember to take care of yourself, or everything you are trying to attain for your home might go to pot.